Why is Your Life Not What You Want It to Be?

Do you feel that your life is not how you’d like it to be? Do you feel that things are just not falling into the right place for you? Do you want to change it but don’t know where to start? If you really want change, there’s no better time to start than the present moment. You need to identify the root cause of your unhappiness and start making both small and bigger changes in your life. And, when working on making a change, there are some things you have to let go of, in order to heal from your past wounds. Life is what you make it. Here are some small steps which can help you live a better and more fulfilling life.

Stop Comparing your life to others’

In this era of social media, it always appears that everyone is living their best life — that is, everyone except you. You should keep in mind that social media is just like a highlight reel. Comparing your daily life to a single picture capturing a perfect moment isn’t the best use of your time. Every body is different and nothing good comes out of you comparing your life to others.

Bottling Up Your Emotions

Your unexpressed emotions will weigh you down. This is one of the most significant things to let go of. Sometimes we don’t have the energy, or simply don’t want to deal with some of the things we feel, think, and we compartmentalize them. We put them away in a box. As a defense mechanism, we also avoid situations that trigger those emotions to surface. Sooner or later, all those intense feelings will come pouring out in a messy, uncontrollable way. Don’t keep your emotions bottled up. Talk to a friend, find a therapist. If you’re suppressing negative feelings about one of your relationships, talk to the other person in a kind, non-judgmental way. When you’re unable or don’t feel ready to talk to someone else, write. Express your emotions by journaling. Doing this will not only help with the emotional toll but working through your feelings will also help you understand them better.

Taking Things Too Personally

Not everything is about you. Don’t overthink it if someone is being a little short with you, isn’t very friendly, doesn’t laugh at your joke. Learn to let these things go and stop jumping to conclusions. The truth is, not everyone is a perfectly pleasant and kind person. Also, not everyone is always having a great day or feels well, or is in a great mood. People go through their own things and we can’t think that everything is about us. Stop taking things too personally and feeling bad about them.

Unhealthy Habits

Focus on one unhealthy habit at a time, one that troubles you the most. Are you overindulging in food or alcohol? Are you not getting enough sleep, not exercising? Don’t make a “resolution” but make a plan instead. How exactly are you going to change things? What tools will you use to make the change easier for yourself? Don’t try to change everything at once- focus on one habit at a time. It takes 21 days to form a new habit. We can’t control our genes, and we can’t control all of our circumstances, but we can rid ourselves of habits that serve no purpose other than to make us miserable.

Fear Of Failure

Fearing failure is something we all struggled with at some point in life. One of the easiest ways for to let go of the fear of failure is to tell yourself that at some point, it will happen. So what?  What’s the worst that can happen if you do fail? How else will you learn, if not by doing, trying, by making mistakes? As long as you keep trying, keep learning and keep getting up, you’re winning.

Vishakha

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